Jun 7, 2012

The Hapless House-keeper

Posted by Tonia at Thursday, June 07, 2012
by Tonia

“Always keep several get well cards on the mantle ... so if unexpected guests arrive, they will think you've been sick and unable to clean.” – Erma Bombeck

I have never been a very good house-keeper.  Don’t like it and don’t do a good job at it. It must be some kind of genetic defect because I come from a family of OCD house-cleaners. My mother shopped for cleaning supplies like I shop for shoes. Even both of my daughters (co-bloggers) keep lovely, tidy homes. I tend to clean only when I’m having a party – or when I’m broke and hoping to find loose change. I mean, for goodness sake, why did God create doorknobs if we weren’t supposed to hang clothes on them?

My poor house-keeping has created a few tensions with my daughters, however. Rachel refuses to eat anything out of my refrigerator until she checks the date on it. Anna threatens to wear a helmet when she opens cupboard doors. Both of them have suggested that I have guests sign liability waivers when I entertain. Brats. They probably wash their WHOLE panty hose and not just the feet and crotch.

Personally, I think the layers of film and dust on my windows help filter the harmful (and aging!) rays of sunlight. AND, if I should get lucky and get laid during the daytime, they help create a more romantic ambiance. Besides, at my age, the low lighting helps.

But I DO like to entertain, so here are my top three house-keeping tips:

(1) Eliminate kitchen odors by eating out
(2) Stash loose items in your oven and dryer. Just don’t use those appliances later!
(3) Stretch caution tape across the door to any room where you wish to discourage visitors from entering (biohazard tape and police crime scene tape also work)

Tell us about your housecleaning adventures. And, for your next girlfriends’ get together, try this fabulous margarita recipe. We call it Cleaning Naked Margarita.

Cleaning Naked Margarita

12 oz frozen limeade
12 oz of 7 up
12 oz of tequila
12 oz Corona
Slices of lime

Mix together the liquids, put a slice of lime on the side of the glass and serve. I like salted rims, but then I like salty guys…..I mean, salty drinks.


Unknown on June 7, 2012 at 5:33 PM said...

When cleaning for a party you focus on the public areas of the house right? The kitchen, living room, guest bath, etc. Well my husband does the opposite. The following are things he's cleaned while getting ready to entertain/house guests:
organized the filing cabinet, cleaned our closet, washed the back yard windows. Next time I'll make your margarita first!

growingmygirls.com on June 8, 2012 at 9:32 AM said...

Nah, you're a better housekeeper than you think! Love the doorknob idea -- opens a whole new range of possibilities!

MsCheeVS on June 23, 2012 at 12:33 AM said...

Hey sis ....u just visited and i did the quick clean too. I relate. :(

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