Online Dating Is Pure Entertainment

By Anna

After weeks of licking my wounds from the 101st breakup with the same man, I decided it was time to get out there again. In the past I've met guys in traditional ways -- you know, bars -- but this time I decided to try something new. You see, I'm an online dating virgin. It's hard meeting decent men - and as my mother always says, "Lots of men worth having - but few worth keeping."

Everyone tells me that internet dating is just like shopping - you get to pick out men and try them on for size. You know, see if they fit - and if they make you look good. I'm all about lookin' good so I decided to give it a go.

Set up my profile using some of my better (duh!) pics with a short bio explaining that I was looking for "a fun-loving man that is honest and genuine." The messages started flooding in. I didn't know that the universe was full of so many fun, honest and genuine men. **eye roll**

I chose someone who was decent looking, and educated (so he said). After several messages we decided to meet during the day at Sam's Club because he needed some things and I love Sam's. Not a typical date - but safe.

When I arrived, the guy was waiting for me inside the building even though he knew I couldn't get in without a card. I was stretching my neck like a nosey neighbor watching an affair across the street - trying to look inside for him each time the automatic doors opened and closed. Finally caught a glimpse of him and waved (hoping to God it was him). He walked to the door to meet me but we couldn't make contact because Crazy Driver on the Scooter Buggy kept jerking her "vehicle" in random directions. She blocked the doorway and ran over several sets of feet. (Those things need a drivers' safety class!) The guy and I danced a jig and lunged at each other several times just trying to shake hands. It took several attempts. Finally succeeded - and, of course, he was not nearly as cute in person.

Found out that he lives alone with four dogs (must really need a best friend). And fun-loving? Well, he must have thought throwing toilet paper over the aisle into the shopping cart qualified him as fun-loving. Not exactly what I had in mind.

After what seemed like hours of browsing the aisles for his oatmeal and dog food we finally made our way to checkout. After the checker ran all of his items through, his card declined!

We said our quick goodbyes and nice to meet yous and I'm thinking this guy wouldn't dare ask me for a second date. Silly me. He did. I politely declined, told him I didn't sense any chemistry and thanked him for his time. He chirped back at me, "How much chemistry can you pick up on in Sam's Club?" He still messages me!

So this is what I learned:

• Never judge a profile by its internet cover
• Hold your phone # in maximum security until after a successful 1st date
• Bring your own money....just in case
• Drink a Zombie - don't date one

Single girlfriends always like to get together to talk about dating fiascos.

Invite them over, share dating war stories and serve this fabulous

Pink Dragon Drink.

Pink Dragon

1 oz. Bacardi Dragon Berry Rum

1 oz. X-Rated Fusion® liqueur

1 oz. lemon-lime soda

Pour the alcohol into a short glass filled with ice. Top with lemon-lime soda.
If you'd like, rim with sugar and put a lime wedge on the side.