Jul 30, 2011

Getting Off My Ass

Posted by Tonia at Saturday, July 30, 2011
By Tonia

I don’t understand why people drive to the gym simply to get on a treadmill. Do they need the bars to hold on to while they walk? Are they afraid wild animals will attack them if they step outside? Maybe they just want to be close to a defibrillator….

I recently decided I needed to get into shape so I signed up for a yoga class – well, I thought it was yoga. Turned out to be NIA – which is a blend of martial arts, dance, and yoga. Being a person who is exceedingly thankful for the ability to simply walk without falling, this was going to be a challenge – not unlike the horrors of high school gym class where only the written test enabled me to pass.

I was hoping to find an exercise partner. Unfortunately Johnny Depp and Brad Pitt have unlisted numbers.

The first thing I noticed when I arrived alone was that my 25 year old denim shorts and t-shirt looked like an outfit from a White Trash Bash. Everyone had on beautiful, flowing NIA outfits or cute, tight, little exercise clothes. I wouldn't have looked more out of place if I had come dressed in a pumpkin costume and Wonder Woman boots with tampons sticking out of my ears. I should have left in shame but was warmly welcomed by just about everyone.

So, after being greeted on that first traumatic day, I snuck to the back of the class (thank God there was still room) to avoid observation and that damn mirror-on-steroids. But, wouldn’t you know it, the instructor lead the class in a turn so I was then in the front! At least two steps behind, I pigeon-toed my way through the routine with utter bafflement across my sweating, beet-red face doing some kind of jerking, whirling, downward facing dog at the fire hydrant. In fact, if you saw that episode in Seinfeld where Elaine danced, that would be elegant compared to this.

But I’ve continued to go back. For some people practice makes perfect. For me practice makes….well….repetition. But I do feel better and I actually think I’m more balanced – which may ultimately give me more confidence about doing that walking thing without falling.

So, for your next girlfriends’ party, consider some kind of dance or exercise activity. Get a DVD or ask someone to lead. I highly recommend NIA if you don’t know which kind of movement you might be interested in. Check it out at http://nianow.com/


Lady Estrogen on July 30, 2011 at 2:32 PM said...

I miss dancing - I really need to do something about that as well ;) Cha-cha, baby!

elizafayle on July 30, 2011 at 2:52 PM said...

I have a dance instructional video for the Wii Kinect. I LOVE it. It starts off with easy steps and builds with each level of a dance routine and the other dance routines. Salsa, hip hip, disco, you name it, it's in there. Fun, fun, fun!

growingmygirls on July 30, 2011 at 4:37 PM said...

Glad to find out more about what it's like! I keep being tempted, maybe once the kids are back in school I'll finally get there!

E. S. Ball on July 31, 2011 at 8:16 AM said...

I think this kind of dance party is a great idea and would keep energy levels up (and party fatigue down). Add in some Gatorade mixers and you've got a winner!

Tonia on July 31, 2011 at 10:41 AM said...

OMG! LOVE the Gatorade mixers!

Erin on August 1, 2011 at 11:03 PM said...

I say the next time you go you wear those wonder woman boots with tampons sticking out of your ears...just for the absolute shock and fun factor of it! :)

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